Happy Birthday, Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern, Oil and Water

"Don't be afraid of opposition. Remember, a kite rises against, not with the wind." ~ Hamilton Wright Mabie

Clever or stupid, dirty or clean, good or bad, right or wrong, right or left, safe or dangerous, simple or complicated — Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern, literally and metaphorically face away from each other, and move through the world in opposite directions. If perchance they were to meet, they'd be like oil and water.

Rush Limbaugh, the stereotypical conservative talk show host, is sharply critical of feminism, marriage equality, environmentalism and climate science, and drug abuse (except, hypocritically, his own), and is chronically inaccurate and distorting on so many issues, and equally unaccountable to anyone but his advertisers. Limbaugh was born on January 12th and is a radical Right American radio jockey, as well as an ultra-conservative political talking head.

On the other end of the spectrum lies Howard Stern, who's openly tempted by strippers and female porn stars, fantasizes about sex with lesbians (while he's likely reviled by most of them), and is often the target of stalkers and death threats. The cranky, scatological, sexualized, "sophomoronic," and self-proclaimed "King of All Media" is a true Libertarian, an on-again-off-again eco-crusader and, just like Limbaugh, also an American radio host and television personality. (Hmmm? He's was also born January 12th. Any astrologists out there wanna help explain this phenomenon?)

It's amazing that these two men were born on the same day and followed similar career paths. They both ended up doing the same jobs, but each doing it so completely differently, each an absolute original, and both developing committed cult followings. Upon closer inspection, you'll notice that one is a wacky, out-of-control, bombastic and self-promoting, insecure yet opinionated larger-than-life overachiever. And the other one — um, well, he's also a wacky, out-of-control, bombastic and self-promoting, insecure yet opinionated larger-than-life overachiever. They're polar opposites. But the contradiction is in their similarities — an almost parasitic/host scenario — two sides to a bad penny. Together you've got something like gale force winds feeding an out-of-control brush fire — one bad thing making yet another bad thing even worse.

And what a wonderful metaphor for contradiction: oil and water, the two most precious resources on Earth. (No...I'm no longer referring to Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern.)

There's no substitute for water. In fact, the United Nations considers access to clean drinkable water as a fundamental human right. Only three percent of the water on earth is potable freshwater; the rest is saltwater, and only 20 percent of the world's population has running water, while more than one billion people have absolutely no access to clean water. Think about that the next time you leave the tap running while you brush your teeth!

But oil? (In my opinion, the guys are kinda oily, too, but hey, we're now into the "serious" part of the blog!). There's precious little fossil fuel oil on the planet, and we're going through it like there is no tomorrow. But, there are mountains of environmentally friendly, clean and renewable alternatives such as wind, solar, hydro and biofuels. Think about that the next time you brush your teeth, too — hey, you gotta think of something, so why not something eco-conscientious?

Dirty or clean, good or bad, right or wrong, safe or dangerous, simple or complicated — it's all about the choices we make. And that includes listening to either Rush Limbaugh or Howard Stern, too.