September 18, 2008 at 3:46PM
By Deirdre Dolan
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My biggest fear in the weeks leading up to the birth of my first child wasnt missing movies, or fifty hours of labor, or tearing horribly (that was my second biggest). All I kept thinking about, with the kind of dread I used to feel for math finals, was the loss of daily sleep to come. I figured if so many hard things about a new baby never even get mentioned, the amount of talk sleeplessness gets must mean it applies to 99% of parents. And I guess this is because sleep issues are never one-sided. If your baby isnt eating you still manage to get some dinner, and if shes crying her eyes out youre probably mostly just watching her, but if shes not sleeping peacefully, theres no way around it, neither are you. I wasnt into a lot of pre-baby parenting advice and didnt read a lot of books, but my ears definitely pricked up any time conversations veered towards sleep and sleep tricks. Instead of taking a wait-and-see approach, we adopted the philosophy of Gina Ford, who wrote a book called The Contended Little Baby that freaked any friends who saw it on my table because shes British and strict.
Ford believes in black out curtains for the nursery, and wont even consult with parents who dont have them. Maybe we were being defensive to the point of dramatic, but my thinking was that if I hadnt tried absolutely everything to make sleep easy for the baby, if she didnt sleep I wouldnt know why. I realize now ...